Old-school hospitality is alive and well: teatime delicacies are served on copper trays, bellboys wear tuxedos to carry luggage to gilded suites, and cooks wear towering hats. But in the age of Amazon Prime, when we all want everything instantly, how do you combine aristocratic service with lightning-fast wish fulfillment? To find out, I accepted an offer from New York's iconic Plaza Hotel . to join his team of butlers, a clique of 10 men (and one woman!) who trot around the property's 20 floors day and night, making sure guests in the 282 rooms feel like royalty . For two hot days in July, I ran around the property with a team that, like the city itself, seemingly never sleeps -- hearing tales of the trade from department head Emma and serving the guests along with some of their most experienced employees.
one
During my short tenure, I delivered clothes to Middle Eastern princesses and pulled lobsters from the wishing well, and listened to colleagues revel in the oddities of their work, from serving a guest requesting Viagra to comforting a woman crying over a few spilled blueberries. Here are some secrets to keep in mind the next time you check into a five-star hotel. THE VIP LIST Hundreds of orders are filled each shift, mainly for filling ice buckets, doing laundry and shining shoes. Complimentary packing and unpacking requests are also common, though they can turn into day-long affairs. A surprising number of international guests ask for adjoining suites: one for sleeping and one for their luggage. As a matter of corporate philosophy, every guest should feel like a VIP at the Plaza. But there is a hierarchy among those who check in at the front desk. At the top of the pyramid are the kings, queens, and heads of state, or as the butlers call them, the V1s, and they frequent the establishment. Then come the high-payers, the long-stayers, the guests who book a large block of rooms, and the well-known celebrities. They are called VD, or distinguished visitors. At the bottom of the VIP list are guests known as complainers or otherwise difficult and demanding, requiring "special assistance."
one
WHEN THE GUEST TAKES A BATH Another common request for the butler team is to prepare the bathtub with a mixture of salts and essential oils and roses, especially during the colder months of the year. But butler duties don't necessarily end once the tub is full. Bal, a bathroom specialist at the Plaza , said that 95 percent of the time he is asked to remain close at hand to reach the guest with other items. Most of them, he told himself, want more hot water or scented oil, and are happy to keep the butler close by while they relax naked. GUESTS ARE RATHER PREDICTABLE The Plaza's guest relations team researches everyone who stays at the hotel on an individual basis, using a variety of social media tools (a favorite is LinkedIn.com).
one
Butlers, on the other hand, often use past trends to classify people. They send electric jugs to the rooms of incoming Asian guests , who often bring noodles from home to cook in their suite. They keep the minibar well stocked for Americans in their thirties to forties, heavy drinkers of all kinds of beverages. Middle Eastern VIPs get what are called "Arabian delights": a platter of dates, dried fruit and nuts; they tend to prefer these to chocolates, cakes or other sweet desserts. And butlers know immediately if Western businessmen have shirts or suits to wash and iron... except when they're totally unpredictable. Despite the overwhelming regularity of these behaviors, travelers can confuse even the most experienced butlers. On one occasion, a woman called Emma crying hysterically "as if her husband had died and she had just discovered her body." When Emma finally calmed her down, she understood the real reason for her tears: there were no more tissues in her suite, and her little daughter had been forced to blow her nose with toilet paper.
